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Wednesday, July 8, 2009

PREJUDICES....














Dear Baby,

There are some instances in our childhood which have a marked impression through the rest of our lives. Today while you were happily listening to one of your cherished bed time stories....U eagerly came up with some incident which occurred in your day-care centre.....U had made some "real good buddies" as you usually address for your group of friends there....U were excited about a new friend...And u eagerly described her features as "tall and black "instead of tall and dark. I was shocked but controlled myself and patiently corrected your statement....(Somebody possibly an adult must have commented about the poor child's feature that way ) 'cause I was dead sure this was not your way to usually describe anyone......Somewhere deep within I was hurt...this was unexpected from YOU otherwise such a sensitive and considerate child....But still I realized you were a child...who needs continuous guidance....I made some subtle changes in the story which I was telling you to make you understand that the chief causes of human errors is to be found in the prejudices picked up in childhood....and....No one in the world can make you feel inferior without your own consent...Dear baby always remember Lots of friends would want to ride with you in your shiny,new bicycle but...what you really need deep within is someone who would play with your rag doll even when your bicycle breaks down....This is how you come across true friends....Momma will always love you.....

Friday, July 3, 2009

Homework Pains.....


Dear dear Aastha...
Its been a tough day for Mummy darling...and you have decided to try out all my patience...as an added incentive... "Ma'am has given homework .Mommy." I hear a small voice...Couldn't imagine it came out from U...always such a bubbly kid.....sounding so down..."We sit for home works everyday darling.....and you seem to enjoy them...what's so scary today...?" I reply patiently and reach out for the school Diary.She tries to push it behind her.
THERE!!!!!...... (I make a quick Guess)... lies the Origin of the small voice....I firmly ask it to be given.....and i open it.... to find the School Diary in a mess...Pages torn and all scribbled up in her tiny handwriting....with a pinned note from her class teacher (like a hidden shilling in the Christmas pudding).....requesting a A Parent Call!!!
I groan and fret while my husband stands by the door faking anger....smothering possibly a ear to ear grin..(Always such a hard task master.... strangely ...He seems to always enjoy any damn mischief played by her...). I feel like screaming my head off!!! "This is what I get after a hard days work..." I shout...which made U further shudder and scurry off behind DAD ...your only refuge...supporter...fortress.....during these special times.....I try to calm myself down and call u beside me...How did this happen darling??? and U(can u imagine????) broke off into giggles as one sharing those special moments with your best friend....giggles...those infectious ones and...and I laughed with U unable to restrict myself further. We laughed together...The familiar tinkle in your laughter which I try to recognize and find it buried deep inside me.....I hadn't laughed so openly in years...Later I found that U had one of those happy times in school today when one of your subject teachers was absent and One of the Seniors had come to mind the class.....U had coolly scribbled your happiness of the moment in this chosen DIARY...which is updated by the Class teacher at the end of each day...!!! And as a matter of fact.... today was no exception the class teacher had entered her choicest vocabulary to describe your feat of the day plus an open invitation to us to UR classroom the next day!!! These childish feats would get over when u grow up up baby but...U need to know that the School Diary is a matter of Pride for Every Student...and it is the FACE of Every School...so U should always respect it... and involuntarily get respected.....

Tuesday, June 30, 2009




My Dear Baby....
This is my third letter to you...hoping you would go thru this when you probably feel low during those difficult times when Mummy seems too small a word....this is just to remind you that mummy has gone through the very same troubles dear...you know the rebellious teens and the troublesome twenties.....when she was your age...if that's of any help to you so that you feel free to talk about it. It doesn't matter what we talk about really what matters most is the invisible line of connection we create in spite of the time and distance between us....You know dear the medical Science says that when a tiny brain grows... continuous development of a circuitry network of neurotransmitters and jumpy dendrites branch out for your psychological protection creating a software or a blue print of patterns in ur little brain designed to keep you safe and help you thrive...to deal with your future....and do you know the continuous GUIDE is the Mother...leading you thru the pros and cons of every tiny situation you face...be it the Dog next door...or the Car round the corner of the lane while you happily toddle hand in hand with mommy knowing you have nothing to fear.........Dear baby...I still remember how penetrating and demanding your look was when I first lifted you into my arms...Judging and demanding a stronger human being than yourself...You don't realize the kind of subtle strength (possibly upherited from you) i felt when i first held you ...while you happily cooed away into the crook of my arm .....YOU are my strength and mark of my existence....Always remember dear no matter what Mommy would always look up to you...anytime...always...

Sunday, June 28, 2009




God's Gift.....So Pure...
I looked into those deep deep eyes.....and i feel an internal peace....as if a message being transmitted from the masters of a higher plane.....solemnly declaring my fears away....IVY!!! a far away voice calling me....I don't feel like responding....IVY??? someone questioning my presence. I jerked out of this beautiful world with a start. My Husband standing beside me was gently patting on my shoulders ...trying to bring me out of this peaceful trance. He handed me my cellphone and urged me to talk into it...my best friend had called...My friend..my guide..my soulmate....TANNI!!! all bundeled into one exclusive friendship package.....lifetime free... no initial charges...what else would one require to say yes!!! She was silently waiting for me to collect myself...and then congratulated me...Something burried deep into my heart seemed to brim over and roll down my cheeks...she was awfully happy and took the very next flight avaiable to visit our guardian angel....what a stroke of luck it was that even the royal priest of HER EXCELLENCY had sent his blessings through her....Another unexpected gift from GOD....

Friday, June 26, 2009


Letters To My Daughter about MY Experiences with Truth...
This is meant for all those parents who are madly in love with their children....Its just an attempt to leave behind some lessons for ur children which would act as a guiding light throughout their lives....This in fact is A Tribute to My Child who has made my life so meaningful and worthwile....to live in. In many ways She has played the TUTOR which I never had.... but always wanted..... SHE infact is my guiding STAR....



We all know...A man who travels alone ..travels the fastest..My daughter teaches me how to travel together....

MY Dear Daughter...


05.march 2005 :-This is a real shaky moment for me.....Everybody's anxiously waiting for the arrival of a STAR....YOU.....I am engrossed with my state...worried about your arrival....wishing GOD... The GOD of Gods.... Lord Shiva.... for a healthy YOU....Medicines dripping into me....perhaps doing there best to calm my ruffled nerves...14 hours of that sweet pain which every mother perhaps undergoes....I walked up to the labour room.....once...twice...Then the most fearful moment of my life...Momma went stiff...U had stopped moving...The doctor was closely monitoring your uneven heartbeat...encouraging me at the same time not to lose hope....I prayed with all my might...I did not let a tear drop out...perhaps u did not want momma to get weak..."YOU HAVE TO COME BACK TO ME!!!" my soul cried out TO YOU!!! silently and steadily I kept praying....And then everything went dark...I was closing my eyes...Leaving everything on to GOD.....I saw a beautiful LIGHT......in the shape of a star....That was U....MY GUIDING STAR....COME BACK my soul cried out....and I opened my eyes.....The DOC...later on to be Your Godmother made me walk to the Operation Theatre...with Daddy holding on to mamma's hand....AND there lo behold I could actually see U Moving inside me....THANK YOU! THANK YOU !!! THANK YOU GOD!!!! My soul cried out....sweaty with pain and relief....I knew had to be a baby GIRL!!!! No SON in the world would have connected so loudly and clearly with his to-be-mother....THANK YOU Honey....Mamma loves you!!!